I’m gonna break my “rule” a bit here because this bit of commentary is based largely in my experience with…well…my life.
Why is communication such a freaking difficult concept for people to deal with? Seriously. I left my old job because I thought that those above me were not only bad at communication it seemed as though they would actually combat it at times.
Now I’m working at a new place. I really do like the people I work with (at least those I’ve met) but now I am finding once again that communication seems to be a difficult issue. It’s not that people don’t listen. I think they do, but it’s the concept of what is “effective communication” as it relates to this particular organization. I’ve already been wrapped up in a couple of situations that were, in my opinion, a result of communication gaps.
The funniest thing relating to this topic was the training I had for what I am now doing in my life. I had to watch a video on “effective communication” (a term and concept I am already quite familiar with due to my background as a facilitator and user of experiential communication), and I must say that I had a laugh. I pretty much checked out from the start because the guy who was supposed to be very versed in the concept of communication said communication was two things:
A nice idea but the first thing that sprang into my mind (sarcastically) was, “Wow, I guess people who are deaf and mute are screwed then.” The guy then went on to do the whole breakdown of how communication (spoken) worked. You know the whole 70% is how you look and body language, 20% is tone of voice and only 10% is words. Those percents will change of course depending on what research and study you check, but the end result is usually the same and that is that we don’t “hear” words as much as we think.
Oh, and I believe that "effective" communication does entail two things. They are:
1. Giving information
2. Receiving information
As luck would have it the other day I am talking to a gentleman in the park about communication again. As it turns out he recently attended a workshop on communication (his organization paid loads of money for the guys who did the presentation). After we talked about the presentation he attended I asked him how much of what he heard was a “duh” concept. He said all of it was.
This is what amazes me so much about our society. We’re constantly striving to “improve” things and yet here we sit not able to grasp even some of the most (seemingly) basic concepts of existing in a society and world with other individuals.
The daily things [like this and that and what is what]
That keep us all busy
Are confusing me
To me this all goes back to the title of this little experiment that my journal is, and that is that the mundane distractions of everyday life pull our attention away from those things that if we put our time towards, could probably really help increase the positivity of the world around us, on both a micro and macro scale.
Yet, how can anyone expect others to pull their focus away from things like family and survival (economically, emotionally, etc.) in order to create a better world. I could try to fault others for doing such a thing, but I don’t believe it would be proper. The state of my life (no kids, no relationship, etc.) affords me the time to look out on a larger level and ask, “Why.” It’s such a freaking conundrum for me.
When we are older you'll understand
It's enough when I say so
And maybe some things are that simple
How effective is your communication? Do you play the games others play? Do you strive for clarity when you don’t have it, or do you choose to make the assumption of what others are saying?
The lyrics I popped in here (because I think they fit) are from the song below. I’ve never played Kingdom Hearts, but I really dig the song.